The Last Seduction Read online

  Sasha quietly studied Hannah as she ate. Her tight jaw flexed, and the sunlight played with her shoulder length chestnut brown hair. Her hazel eyes shone against the mint green of her shirt, and Sasha could smell her freshly showered scent from across the table. She often used a men’s body wash, and the scent was strong and fresh and spicy. It awakened her senses and it used to drive her mad. She took a sip of juice and realized that even though she wasn’t being driven mad with desire, it was still affecting her.

  She cleared her throat and willed her insides to stop spinning out of control like a crazy carousel. Hannah was off limits now. It was over. She’d told her at the hospital that her stay here meant nothing. It couldn’t. She couldn’t go through it again with her. Sure she cared and she was going out of her way to show it now, but how long would it last? How long before the depression overtook her again? How long before Sasha was once again sitting at a table in the Italian restaurant waiting for her?

  It couldn’t happen again.

  Sasha swallowed another bite of eggs and finished her juice. Then she excused herself, no longer able to eat. Hannah called after her, but she ignored her. She couldn’t look back. Not now or ever.

  Chapter Nine

  The doorbell rang as Hannah was finishing cleaning up after breakfast. She grabbed a dish towel and wiped her hands as she headed for the door. It was nearing ten, and she wondered who it could be. Casey was already at class at the community college, and Bonnie was probably at work. Hannah pulled open the door and squinted into the bright morning light. Charlie stood looking at her with a broad smile.

  “Morning.”

  Hannah tried to focus through her shock and dismay. “What are you doing here?”

  Charlie looked taken aback. “I’m here to tend to Sasha. Remember? I’m her nurse?”

  “Yes, I can remember as far back as yesterday, thanks. I’m just wondering why you are here so early.”

  “I’m concerned about her fever. It was rather high yesterday. Can I come in?”

  Hannah stepped back and pushed open the door. Charlie bypassed her without another word. Hannah closed the door behind her and followed her into the kitchen.

  “She ate some breakfast,” Hannah said. “I made her a homemade breakfast, and she really enjoyed it.”

  Charlie began to dig through her bag. Hannah watched her muscled arms move and strain against her dark purple scrubs.

  “That’s good, good that she’s got her appetite.”

  “Yes. Well, she does.”

  Charlie retrieved her stethoscope and some surgical gloves. “Where is she?”

  “She’s in her room. I’ll go get her.”

  “That’s okay. I can do it. I need to examine her, and I’m sure she’ll want some privacy.”

  But Hannah wasn’t about to stop. She hurried down the hallway and stopped at Sasha’s door. She cocked her head when she heard water running from the bathroom. Charlie showed up at her heels.

  “She’s in the bathroom,” Hannah said, crossing to knock on the door. “Sash? I hope she’s not trying to bathe alone. She’s still weak, and with that PICC line she’s really only got one arm.” She knocked again. “Sash? Can you let me in?”

  The water stopped running. Sasha called out.

  “I can’t. I’m in the tub.”

  “I think maybe I should go in and help her,” Charlie said.

  “No.” Hannah blocked her access. “That’s not necessary. I can do it.”

  “I need to make sure she doesn’t get that arm wet. I’m her nurse. It’s what I’m here for. “

  Hannah laughed. “Right, and I bet you’re just loving that aren’t you?” Hannah opened the door a crack and Sasha quickly covered her chest.

  “Hannah, what are you doing?”

  Hannah stepped in. “I’m trying to help you. There’s no way you can get out of there on your own.”

  Charlie stepped in after her. “Do you need help, Ms. Bashton?”

  Sasha stared at both of them with her mouth open. “I’m fine. I can do it myself.”

  “Okay then. Just call me when you’re ready to get out,” Charlie said.

  Sasha nodded and gave Hannah a dirty look.

  “Thank you, Charlie. I’ll do that.”

  Hannah shook her head and tried to argue, but Sasha stopped her.

  “In fact, Charlie, why don’t you stay? Hannah, we’ll be fine.”

  Hannah backed away in disbelief. She gripped the doorknob as the feeling of nausea she’d felt the night before overcame her. She stumbled from the bathroom and hurried down the hall and exited through the garage. She climbed in her truck and collapsed against the steering wheel. She pounded it with her fists and cried. She cried for the first time in a very, very long time.

  Sasha was gone.

  * * *

  “Mom. Mom, oh my God.” Hannah heard Casey’s voice, but it sounded far away.

  “Wha?”

  “Mom, come on. Jesus, you’re burning up out here.” She felt him slide his arm around her and help her from the truck. She gained her bearings and leaned into him. They were in the garage, and it was stifling hot with the door closed.

  He tugged on her and helped her inside. “What were you doing out there? Do you know how lucky you are that I found you?”

  “No, I’m fine. It’s fine.” But she was weak and tired and so thirsty. She fell onto the couch and heard Casey rush to the fridge where he banged around. Then he was at her side in ninja-like speed, placing cold packs on her.

  “Keep this on the back of your neck and put these under your arms.”

  She did so but winced against the icy cold feel of them. He handed over a cold bottle of water. “Sip it,” he said.

  “Okay, all right.”

  He stood before her and watched with his hands on his hips.

  “What the fuck were you doing out there? You weren’t like trying to kill yourself were you?”

  She glared at him. “Of course not.”

  “Then what the hell, Mom?”

  “I went out there to…to get away. But I ended up falling asleep I guess.”

  “Yeah, Sash filled me in on the bathtub brawl. She figured you got mad and left. So I went in the garage to look for your car. Thank God I did. We had a record high today, Mom. Over a hundred degrees. With these temperatures—”

  “I’m fine.”

  But really she was very tired and weak.

  “You went out there and had a fit didn’t you? Maybe cried real hard like you do sometimes?”

  She didn’t answer. She was embarrassed enough at the moment.

  He ran his hands through his hair. “What is going on, Mom? Are you drinking again?”

  She shook her head. “No. And as for what’s going on…I don’t know. The nurse. That asshole nurse.”

  “She’s here to treat Sasha whether you like it or not.”

  “I know. I have to accept it. That’s why I went out there and cried. I couldn’t help it because now I know what I need to do for Sasha and for myself.”

  “What’s that?”

  “I have to let her go.”

  Casey sank down on the couch next to her. He squeezed her hand.

  “I think you may be right.”

  “Yeah.” She stared off into space. “That’s what I’m afraid of.”

  Chapter Ten

  The midafternoon sun highlighted Sasha’s thick blond hair as she finger-combed it in the mirror for what felt like the twentieth time. Eventually, she sighed and dropped her hands and instead focused on applying her makeup. She wasn’t doing much because she didn’t want it to be obvious, so she settled with mascara, a little eyeliner, and some lip gloss. Then she sprayed a dab of her favorite perfume, Creed Love in White, on her inner wrists and neck.

  “There.” She smiled. Overall, she was pleased with her appearance even if she did still look a little pale and thin. She’d gained five pounds, which was good, but she definitely needed some color. She’d have to get some sun later
on. It would give her color and vitamin D which her doctor had told her was really low. She relaxed as she imagined the warm sun caressing her skin and giving her body what it desperately craved. Though she’d been feeling better, she was still battling her poor kidney function, and she could feel it by the time evening rolled around when her body grew weak and her muscles burned and stiffened as if she’d lifted weights all day. She’d drift off to sleep at the dinner table, on the couch, or in the bath. Hannah had had to help her more than once to bed. And most times she could hardly remember their encounter by the time morning came when she assumed Hannah must’ve helped her. But Hannah never said a word one way or another.

  Sasha gave herself one last look in the mirror and headed for the kitchen. She recalled how quiet and almost distant Hannah had been lately. She’d been polite but in a strange kind of way. As if they were mere acquaintances and Sasha was renting a room from her. Hannah would offer to cook for her, bring her drinks and fold her laundry, but she’d stopped trying to make conversation. The doorbell rang as Sasha reached the kitchen, and she did her best to hurry to it. She knew it was Charlie, and she couldn’t help but grin. She’d grown quite fond of Charlie the past two weeks, and she knew her attraction was more than obvious. But she couldn’t help herself. She’d been starved for attention, and it felt nice knowing someone else was attracted to her and that she wasn’t an ogre after all. She knew the distance Hannah was showing had something to do with her and Charlie, but she was too scorned to be empathetic toward her.

  Sasha pushed Hannah from her mind as she pulled open the door. Charlie smiled and whipped off her aviator shades.

  “Hi.”

  Sasha heated as she caught her scent in the hot breeze. It was clean with a hint of an ocean breeze, and it set her insides afire.

  “Hi.” She allowed Charlie entry and they brushed each other as she passed by. A touch that didn’t go unnoticed by Sasha.

  “You look nice. Very healthy,” Charlie said. The corner of her mouth lifted.

  “Thank you. I think I need some color. I may get some sun before it sets today.” Sasha closed the door and they crossed to the kitchen. The house was quiet with Casey at school and Hannah at work. Sasha was grateful to have Charlie to herself.

  “Don’t get too much,” Charlie said, setting down her bag. “You’re pretty perfect as it is.”

  “Are you flirting with me?”

  “No, of course not. I’m still your nurse.”

  Sasha made herself comfortable on a stool and awaited her examination and the last application of her antibiotic. It was Charlie’s next to last visit and to say Sasha was disappointed was an understatement.

  Charlie retrieved her stethoscope and listened to her chest front and back. It was difficult for Sasha to control her breathing, and she knew her heart was careening despite her best effort to control it.

  “I noticed that Hannah isn’t around anymore,” Charlie said as she finished. “Everything okay?”

  “Not really, but it’s not anything to worry about.”

  “I take it there’s a history there?”

  “Yes.”

  Charlie checked her temperature. “I don’t want to cause you any trouble.”

  “You haven’t. It’s just something between Hannah and me.”

  The thermometer beeped. “Temp is normal. Great news.”

  Sasha smiled. “Thank God.” A part of her had worried that the antibiotic wouldn’t work. She was more than glad to hear it had. The hospital was the last place she wanted to be.

  Charlie opened the refrigerator and grabbed the plastic ball full of antibiotic. She hooked it to Sasha’s PICC line, and they sat in silence for a while as it dripped into her insides, chilling her to the bone.

  “Cold?” Charlie brought her the blanket from the couch just as she often did.

  “Thank you.”

  “Anything else? Maybe some coffee?”

  “No, I’ll be fine, thanks. I’m just ready for this to be over. Besides, I should be the one offering you the coffee. You’re the guest.”

  “I’d hardly call myself a guest. And something tells me Hannah would agree.”

  Sasha nodded. “Yes.” She sighed softly. “About Hannah. I didn’t really want to get into it, but seeing as how I would like to keep seeing you, I think I’d better discuss her with you. Hannah and I were a couple for many years. And we’ve been separated now for a couple of months. She’s…having a hard time dealing with that. She’s trying to win me back.”

  “I can’t say I blame her,” Charlie said. “I know I wouldn’t want to lose you.”

  Sasha leaned into her. “Oh, I don’t know. I can be a handful.”

  “I think I can handle it. I know I’d like to try.”

  Sasha stared into her eyes. They were deep and vibrant with color, and they seemed to be pulling her in. They grew closer with lips a mere millimeter apart when Charlie’s finger touched Sasha’s mouth.

  “Not quite yet. I’m still your nurse.”

  Sasha groaned. “That was mean.”

  “I’m just being professional.”

  “Of course.”

  “Doesn’t mean we can’t talk about it. I’d definitely love to see you outside of this house.”

  “God, yes, that sounds so good. I need to get out of here. For so many different reasons.”

  “How about you?” Charlie asked. “Do you still have feelings for her?”

  Sasha wasn’t expecting such a direct question. She cleared her throat and shifted a bit, not quite sure what to say. How could she explain what she was feeling and experiencing when she didn’t understand it herself?

  “Okay, I think that answers my question.”

  “No.” Sasha touched her arm. “I’m sorry. I’m just so overwhelmed with all these crazy emotions when I think about my situation with Hannah. And being here right now is just adding to that.”

  “I can understand that,” Charlie said. “But I don’t want to get into the middle of someone’s messy breakup either.”

  “Once I leave here…there should be nothing messy about it. I told her my staying here meant nothing as far as our future. That she was too late to win me back.”

  “Maybe so, but from what I’ve seen, she’s not taking that to heart. She still seems rather serious about you being hers.”

  Sasha stood as she saw the antibiotic nearly completely drained. “I don’t belong to her or anyone. And it angers me that she has the nerve to think that.”

  Charlie stood alongside her. “Okay, let’s calm down. I didn’t mean to upset you.” She gently unhooked the PICC line and held her shoulders. “Let’s forget it for now and concentrate on removing that PICC line shall we?”

  “God, yes. Please.”

  “Good, lead the way to the bedroom. I need you in the supine position.”

  Sasha headed for the bedroom and lay on her back with her PICC line arm on the edge of the bed. She heard Charlie in the bathroom running the sink water, and soon she smelled the soap she’d no doubt used on her hands. When she entered the room with her bag she had on sterile gloves. She smiled as she spread out a towel and the instruments she’d need on the night table.

  “Will this hurt?”

  “It shouldn’t.”

  “I’m still nervous.”

  She laughed as she set out scissors, dressing, stitch cutters, and solution. Sasha swallowed.

  “You really need all that?”

  “Yep.”

  “Oh, God.”

  “Shh, try to relax. You’ll be fine. And just think how much better you’ll feel.”

  Sasha closed her eyes and allowed her mind to drift. As she felt Charlie begin, her thoughts went to Hannah and the way she’d looked so torn and hurt in the bathroom that day with Charlie.

  Can I really fool myself into believing that she doesn’t care?

  Chapter Eleven

  Hannah pulled into the garage after nine and killed her engine and headlights in the darkness. She sat for
a moment and took in the immediate heavy heat that settled over the stopped air conditioning. It reminded her of her stunt a few days before when she sat there crying so hard her body had shook. She’d cried and cried until a numbness overcame her and she was too tired to move. She’d fallen asleep on the steering wheel with hot tears trailing down her face. And still, despite it all, her pain was as fresh as ever, and it didn’t seem to be going away anytime soon.

  She crawled from the truck and entered the cool, quiet house. Dried sweat coated her from her workday outdoors, and she could almost feel the coating crack as she moved. She couldn’t wait for a cold shower, but first she stopped for a cold bottle of water. She sipped it on her way to her bedroom on the other wing of the house. She assumed Sasha was home, but she resisted the urge to check in on her. They hadn’t really spoken in two days, and the silence was killing her.

  Nevertheless, she pressed on, determined to give her space. Though it hurt like hell, she stayed away.

  She stripped as she entered her bathroom and turned on the shower. She faced the mirror and took off her ball cap to run her fingers through her stiff hair. She had white circles around her eyes from where the sun had baked her around her sunglasses. She’d once again forgotten sunscreen. She pulled off her shirt and examined her body. She was slightly toned and sinewy, but she couldn’t get past the scars on her chest. They were dark red and looked a little like half circles, like somebody’s joke of a smiley face. A fucked up pair of smiley faces.

  She ran her fingertips over the scars and thought how funny it was that she didn’t really miss her breasts all that much until she was nude. She’d always been a tomboy and an athlete, and she’d hated the large size of her breasts and the trouble of finding a proper bra, which she’d just rip off as soon as she walked in the door anyhow.